Bart Was The Best(Bill) 165.84 - The Shawshank Reception(Dan) 123.86

Bill, simply put, took fantasy belt to ass in the opening week. This matchup was out of hand from about 12:30 on Sunday, and it could've been much worse. Derrick Henry is seemingly never going to slow down, he had 34.8 points. The Bears made everyone who doubted them look silly by way of D'Andre Swift having 3 total TDs and 31 fantasy points. JSN was just "ok" with 22.2 points. On the flip side I got good performances out of Caleb Williams(in what seems like my only good prediction so far) and Jahmyr Gibbs. They combined for nearly 69 points. Kyle Pitts left a big wet fart on fantasy lineups all across the world with a week 1 goose egg.

Big Nix Energy(Jim) 100.3 - Tetairoa Sexual(Mike) 102.36

Mike secures his first SEWIFFL victory by the narrowest of margins. Javontae Williams and DJ Moore both finished around the 20 point mark, which helped lessen the damage from a bad debut for MarShawn Lloyd who had just 3.7 points. Overall Mike's lineup was decent if unspectatular, but did enough to sneak by this week. Jim's team was led by Justin Jefferson who had 27.2 points in a big victory over Green Bay. Breece Hall, Bucky Irving, and even Dak Prescott held their own, but Jim needed a few more even average performances from the bottom of his lineup and that just didn't happen. Drake London and especially Jaylen Waddle were let downs in week 1. 

Joe Buck Yourself(Andy) 154.52 - Team Powderhoundmals(George) 90.1

This was over before we got one of the best performances of the week. Ken Walker looked like one of the best players in the league on Monday Night Football and possibly exactly what the Chiefs need to have a bounce back season. Denver's supposedly elite defense was carved up by K9 to the tune of 32.6 points. Andy has to have some concerns about the Ladd McConkey sized hole in his lineup after he went out with a scary injury after a fantastic start. George had a couple of really good top end performers in Trevor Lawrence with his 4 TDs and the ever reliable Jonathan Taylor who ran for 100 yards and 2 TDs. That wasn't nearly enough to cover for duds from his WR core. Pickens, Adams, Odunze, and Addison all combined for 14.5 points. Woof. Trey Smack did look like a big league kicker for Green Bay, provided he can start hitting his PATs. 

Ken Walker is the SEWIFFL Player of the Week!

Trash Pandas(Sam) 122.66 - Pack Attack(Randy) 124.36

Marvin Harrison is who we thought he was. After a highly touted preseason the former 4th overall pick had just 1 catch for 33 yards. Bijan Robinson and Josh Allen, as expected, had big games for their respective teams. Allen was especially impressive considering the stout Texans' defense he was going against. Matthew Golden had an efficient 6 grabs for 95 yards. He is still allergic to the end zone. The Ravens offense looks like its for real and they were led by Lamar Jackson. 24.96 fantasy points led Pack Attack this week. Amon-Ra St. Brown got bunch of targets in a close win over New Orleans. He finished with 10 grabs for 67 yards and 2 TDs. You'd like to see that yardage number up, but the targets are invaluable. 

Peeping Thomas(Chris) 120.82 - Muddy Bananas(Zach) 105.76

Both quarterbacks in this matchup left something to be desired. For Chris Drake Maye was just not good. 3 interceptions killed any chance for a big game and for a Patriots victory. For Zach Joe Burrow was better than that, but ultimately only found the end zone once. David Montgomery had a huge debut for Houston, finishing with 3 total TDs and 27 fantasy points. Ja'Marr Chase was invisible, garnering just 4 targets from Burrow, catching 2 of them for 12 yards. A game to forget. Colston Loveland came in with TE1 hype and didn't do a darn thing in a game where his team scored 59 points. 0 points on 0 catches and just 2 targets. Yikes. 

The Bearded Clams(Jeff) 97.2 - Team Cotch11(Ryan) 143.0

A brutal beatdown that looked ugly during the weekday games which saw AJ Brown go down with an ankle injury. Ryan's gamble on Ashton Jeanty paid off well in week 1, 29.7 points in the exact kind of game you envisioned when selecting Jeanty. Jaxson Dart, despite looking like he'll roofie your drink, still had 3 TDs and provided extra danger on the ground with 54 yards rushing. For Jeff he had to have been let down by CMC's lack of touches in the Australia game. I didn't get to see much of that game, but from what I've read the Rams didn't look like they belonged on the field, which in turn led to CMC getting a low workload. That should pay off later in the year for the 49ers and for fantasy owners.