Gentleman welcome to a new pre-season feature. We're gonna break down 2 teams each day until the NFL Season kicks off on Thursday!
As usual I'm going to invite some special guests each day. Today we're going to continue our Dynamic Duo theme. I'm gonna get everyone's least favorite duo back together to do some yelling, welcome to SEWIFFL Skip Bayless and Stephen A Smith!
“Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, to another episode of the SEWIFFL Preview Show! Today we’ve got a loaded slate as we dive deep into two heavy hitters: Randy’s Pack Attack, built around the electric Lamar Jackson and a mini-Bills stack that could make or break his season, and Andy’s Joe Buck Yourself, a squad leaning on the Bengals’ dynamic duo with Joe Burrow and Ja’Marr Chase ready to light up Sundays. Buckle up — Skip and Stephen A. are about to break down the strengths, the weaknesses, and whether these rosters are contenders or pretenders in the SEWIFFL arms race!”
Buffalo Bills Connection: James Cook, Dalton Kincaid, and Khalil Shakir all hail from Buffalo’s offense — Randy basically built himself a mini-Bills stack.
Pac-12 Pipeline: Amon-Ra St. Brown (USC) and Trey McBride (Colorado State Mountain West, but close ties to Pac-12 teams) both came in underrated from out west and blossomed.
Dual-QB Powerhouse: Lamar Jackson (Ravens) and Dak Prescott (Cowboys) both finished as top-6 QBs last year — arguably the best QB room in the league.
Two-Headed Tight End: McBride and Kincaid are two of the fastest-rising young TEs in the NFL, giving Randy insurance and upside at a scarce position.
High Risk/High Reward: Nick Chubb (major injury comeback) and Rashee Rice (suspension) could swing this team’s entire season.
Skip Bayless:
I’ll start it right here, Stephen A. Pack Attack is OVERHYPED. You’re telling me James Cook is a reliable RB1? Please. He’s a change-of-pace back who benefited from Josh Allen doing all the dirty work. And don’t even get me started on Isiah Pacheco — nice player, but he’s not scaring anybody unless he’s running against the Raiders. This running back room is smoke and mirrors, and it’s gonna cost this team.
Stephen A. Smith:
SMOKE AND MIRRORS?! Skip, are you out of your damn mind?! James Cook had nearly 1,600 yards last year. That’s not smoke, that’s PRODUCTION. Pacheco is the heartbeat of that Chiefs run game, Skip! The brother runs like he’s mad at the ground. And then you’ve got Brian Robinson and Rachaad White backing them up — this is depth, Skip. Depth!
Skip Bayless:
Depth? Depth?! What depth when Nick Chubb’s knee is held together by duct tape and Rashee Rice might not even see the field until November? Don’t sit here and act like this team isn’t one injury away from starting Dylan Sampson, who most people couldn’t pick out of a lineup.
Stephen A. Smith:
Oh, here we go, Skip being dramatic again. Let’s talk about the FACTS. Lamar Jackson. MVP. Amon-Ra St. Brown. Top-five WR, Skip. Trey McBride, the breakout star tight end, AND Dalton Kincaid as insurance. This roster is LOADED with young talent. And don’t forget Dak Prescott, who — like it or not — was a top-three fantasy QB last season. That’s security at the most important position.
Skip Bayless:
Security doesn’t win you championships, Stephen A. Explosiveness does. And outside of Lamar and St. Brown, I don’t see the firepower.
Stephen A. Smith:
Skip, you can’t see past your own bias. This team is a PROBLEM. If Chubb even gives you 70% of what he was, and Rashee Rice is back by midseason, Pack Attack is knocking people out in December. Pack Attack is solid, Skip. Lamar Jackson running wild, Amon-Ra looking like one of the best wideouts in the league, and Trey McBride might even be a top-three tight end this year.”
Skip: “Stephen A… WAIT JUST A SECOND. HOLD UP. STOP THE SHOW. I just read further down this roster… and there he is. DAK. PRESCOTT. My man Randy snuck Dak on the bench like we weren’t supposed to notice! This is a game-changer! Dak Prescott, my quarterback, the future Hall of Famer, the most unfairly criticized QB in all of football—ohhh this team just became dangerous.”
Stephen A (laughing): “Skip… you mean to tell me Randy stashes Dak Prescott as a BACKUP, behind Lamar Jackson, and you’re acting like he just drafted Joe Montana in his prime? Stop it. Dak ain’t saving nobody from the bench!”
Skip (voice cracking): “Stephen A, it’s INSURANCE! It’s SECURITY! It’s like keeping a Lamborghini in the garage just in case your Ferrari needs an oil change. Dak Prescott is the most valuable backup in SEWIFFL history. Randy’s got the best QB room in the league and it’s not even close.”
Stephen A: “You’ve officially lost your damn mind, Skip. A Lamborghini? Dak Prescott? He’s more like a Toyota Corolla. Reliable, sure, but you ain’t winning no fantasy championship with that.”
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Stack attack: Josh Allen at QB, paired with a deep WR room featuring Ja’Marr Chase, Puka Nacua, and DeVonta Smith — all top-tier pass catchers.
Dual D/ST coverage with Denver and Kansas City (someone’s playing the matchup game hard).
A sneaky duo of RBs with question marks: James Conner (workhorse but aging) and Kenneth Walker (explosive, but in a committee).
Brock Purdy as a backup QB is luxury depth, especially if Allen misses time.
Veteran + rookie balance: Adam Thielen’s still producing, while Jayden Higgins is a dart throw upside play.
Dallas Goedert gives this squad a reliable, top-10 TE option.
Skip Bayless: “Stephen A., I’ve got to say it… Joe Buck Yourself may have put together the most dangerous receiving corps in SEWIFFL. Ja’Marr Chase, Puka Nacua, DeVonta Smith — that’s unfair! That’s like handing somebody a Lamborghini, a Ferrari, and a Tesla, and saying ‘Pick whichever one you wanna drive today.’ And oh, by the way, Josh Allen is quarterback on this team! This team is a flat-out juggernaut.”
Stephen A. Smith: “Now hold on, Skip, because you conveniently left out the backfield. And what do I always say? You can’t win in fantasy OR in football if you can’t run the ball. James Conner? Durable as a marshmallow. Kenneth Walker? Injured more than my voice after arguing with you every week. And Chase Brown? That man isn’t even guaranteed to sniff the football! So yes, I’ll give you the wide receivers — they’re special. Josh Allen, no question, he’s a superstar. But when it comes to the running backs, this roster looks like it’s on quicksand, Skip.”
Skip Bayless: “Oh stop it, Stephen A.! You’re underselling the Allen-Chase connection. That’s Josh Allen’s rocket arm, paired with one of the top 3 receivers in the league — Ja’Marr Chase! That alone makes this team a contender. And don’t you dare bring up running backs when receivers and quarterbacks run this league now. This isn’t 1995, Stephen A.! It’s about explosive plays — and Andy’s got more firepower than anyone.”
Stephen A. Smith: “First of all, Ja’Marr Chase doesn’t even PLAY with Josh Allen, Skip — he’s with JOE BURROW. See, this is why I keep telling you, you get so wrapped up in your own fantasy, you forget the reality! But I’ll tell you what’s real: Joe Buck Yourself is dangerous. That WR room is elite. Josh Allen can win you weeks by himself. But the question is this — when the fantasy playoffs hit, and Conner is banged up, and Walker’s limping, will those receivers be enough to carry Andy to a title? That’s what I need to see.”
Skip Bayless: “Stephen A., you act like Conner hasn’t been the one reliable piece of the Arizona Cardinals’ entire franchise! Every time I count him out, he puts up 20 fantasy points. And Kenneth Walker? Don’t tell me you don’t fear that man breaking an 80-yard run at any moment! I’m looking at a team that has depth, explosiveness, and the most competitive quarterback in football. This is a championship roster!”
Stephen A. Smith: “Skip, let me tell you what you’re doing right now — you’re living in a fantasy world within a fantasy league. Yes, Conner can put up points… until he misses three games in December. Yes, Walker can break an 80-yard run… but what happens on the 12 other carries when he gives you two yards a pop? Meanwhile, you got Brock Purdy on the bench — I LIKE Brock Purdy, but do you honestly think Andy’s ever starting him over Josh Allen? Please. This bench is filled with question marks, this running back room is a gamble, and that, my friend, is why Joe Buck Yourself is dangerous, but not invincible.”
“That’s gonna wrap up today’s episode of the SEWIFFL Preview Show! We broke down Randy’s Pack Attack, we tore apart Andy’s Joe Buck Yourself, and we had Skip and Stephen A. shouting so loud the microphones almost gave out. As always, today’s show is brought to you by FanDuel — where you can gamble on anything from fantasy football, to snail racing, to whether or not your VCR eats that copy of The Breakfast Club. FanDuel: gamble responsibly… or irresponsibly. Heck, throw your entire mortgage on the line if you think Emilio Estevez survives the movie! And don’t forget to tune in tomorrow, when we’ll be breaking down the next squad in the SEWIFFL and seeing just how unhinged Skip can get about the Cowboys. See you then!”
Joe Buck Yourself could be feasting with the Bengals on this squad. That Bengals defense(Who Dey?...no really....who are they?) is going to be AWFUL and the Bengals will need to score about 100 points to compete. I'm also very curious to see how productive Adam Thielen is going to be for the first few weeks with Jordan Addison suspended.
For an Autodraft squad Pack Attack looks decent. Lamar and the Sun God can carry any team. We'll see how much Brian Robinson and Nick Chubb produce early in the year, because I think both teams, but especially the Texans could move on quickly. Randy's team gets much better by mid-October when Rashee Rice is back.