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A blink of the eye and we're nearly 1/4 of the way through the regular season! We still don't have any sort of playoff picture, nor do we have anyone who is truly out of it. There's plenty of time to scour the waiver wire, pull of a trade, or even just get lucky! This week was one that highlighted the need for depth. Between injuries, star players not performing, and rookies being inconsistent, it was a rather confusing fantasy week.
A note: Apologies for needing to use getty images, but recently Google has made it more difficult to get high quality images from their image search, so I've found dealing with getty provides a higher quality image, even if we're stuck with a big photo credit(but honestly, those photographers probably deserve more credit than they get, so shout out to them.)
Big Nix Energy(4-2) 129.16 - Pack Attack(4-2) 114.22
Big Nix Energy(4-2) 129.16 - Pack Attack(4-2) 114.22
This was anyone's game going into Monday Night Football. Randy lined up Lamar Jackson and Amon-Ra St. Brown down ~30 or so points, so he had a chance. Jim countered with the big lead plus David Montgomery. Anyone who has every had Monty in fantasy knows the stress the Lions can cause. This matchup, however, was stress free. Even before he ripped off the longest run of the NFL season(72 yards) he was having a monster game. He ended up with a career high 151 yards on just 12 carries. Randy picks up his first loss of the season. I suspect we'll see the debut of Quinshon Judkins next week for Big Nix Energy. We'll also be looking to see the first lineup change for Randy.
Cotch11(2-4) 128.92 - Powderhoundmals(3-3) 116.32
Cotch11(2-4) 128.92 - Powderhoundmals(3-3) 116.32
There's no way Ryan went into this week thinking he'd get just 7.5 points out of Saquon Barkley. The Rams have a fantastic defense, but you expect more out of your studs no matter the matchup. AJ Brown finally realized he's an elite wide receiver and put up nearly 20 fantasy points. On the other side, Jonathan Taylor is looking like the best running back in football through 3 weeks and he's putting the Powderhoundmals on his back. A sneaky Cowboys stack paid off for George, with 30 points between Jake Ferguson and George Pickens, but that wasn't enough. A side note, I saw a guy at Kwik Trip by work the other day who was wearing a Zay Flowers jersey, so George isn't the only believer in Waukesha County. George did eek out a win against the median, so he takes something from the week. We'll see next week if George can make the right QB call, can Caleb Williams keep up his QB1 play??
Peeping Thomas(4-2) 117.22 - Bart Was The Best(2-4) 92.58
Peeping Thomas(4-2) 117.22 - Bart Was The Best(2-4) 92.58
Bill was put in a tough predicament this week when Jayden Daniels was announced to be out. The waiver wire in SEWIFFL doesn't exactly ooze skill, so Bill took a shot at a Michael Penix - Drake London stack and that didn't turn out well. Penix got pulled and the Falcons failed to score. Not all is negative though for BWTB, Jordan Mason looked really good and Trey Benson will take over as RB1 in Arizona. He'll have decisions to make every week at WR though. Becker got half of his Denver WR stack to work out, getting 20.8 points from Courtland Sutton. Ricky Pearsall helped make up for another pedestrian game from Brian Thomas Jr. The question this week is: Will Becker be able to pin down the right Flex starter? Injuries and underperformers have made that difficult.
The Salty Spitoon(3-3)141.92 - Pinche Bendejo(2-4) 74.94
The Salty Spitoon(3-3)141.92 - Pinche Bendejo(2-4) 74.94
This one could've been uglier than it ended up being, CeeDee Lamb went out with what is being called a high ankle sprain and will miss multiple weeks. Despite his 0 The Salty Spitoon put up the 2nd highest team total on the year. Cam Skattebo looks like a star in the making in the Meadowlands. On the flip side, Rhamondre Stevenson looks like he might be finding a new job in the near future. I read a stat: In the past year, Rhamondre Stevenson has 9 fumbles and 7 TDs. That spells death in the NFL for a runningback. Malik Nabers and Ladd McConkey were bad and that was the proverbial icing on the cake for Ben. I suspect Ben bounces right back, there's too much talent in that WR Room for him not to.
The Bearded Clams(2-4) 129.36 - Trash Pandas(3-3) 110.12
The Bearded Clams(2-4) 129.36 - Trash Pandas(3-3) 110.12
The Clams crack the win column for the first time this year! CMC got 19 fantasy points on 27 touches, JK Dobbins looks like he's not willing to play 2nd fiddle to anyone, but the real star was the Minnesota Vikings Defense. They put up 35 points, including 2 TDs, 5 Forced Fumbles and 4 sacks. An unreal performance in an absolute thwomping of the Bengals. Sam didn't make any particularly bad decisions, at face value, he just lacked one big pop off game to boost his team total. The Falcons offense faltering is an easy place to look, Bijian still had a good fantasy game, but no TD really limited his production this week. Our defending champ drops to .500. Sam has a lot of talent on his team, but its a matter of finding the right combination to avoid weeks like Jamo had this week.
Joe Buck Yourself(5-1)115.72 - Muddy Bananas(2-4) 100.16
Joe Buck Yourself(5-1)115.72 - Muddy Bananas(2-4) 100.16
You'll likely see some retooling of the roster by Andy this week, despite a league leading 5-1 record, he's also leading the league in injuries. We can only assume James Conner will be cut, unless Andy is feeling generous and wants to keep him on IR in hopes of getting a pity ring, and the Purdy-Jennings stack in SF is still banged up. However when you've got a duo like Puka and JaMarr Chase you can tank some lower level players around them. I heard on the Fantasy Footballers podcast today, and my write ups are never meant to influence(I really do try to remain objective with my "journalism"), but "Marcus Mariota has been a top 10 QB 3 times in the past year, and started 1 game, CJ Stroud has had 2 top 10 weeks in that same timeframe." Zach is almost through the suspension of Jordan Addision, we'll see how he debuts for the Vikings when he's back.
Bonus talk: Last week we were looking for the team with the most receptions...and that is none other than yours truly. The Salty Spitoon had 38 receptions on the week, Andy came in 2nd with 35 team receptions.
This week we'll keep a somewhat similar competition and go with the team that has the most Team TDs(Passing + Rushing + Receiving + D/ST) in the case of a tie we'll go to most fantasy points.
We're not going to forget it this week: The Week 3 SEWIFFL Player of the Week is: The Minnesota Vikings D/ST. They had a massive NFL game and that helped spell victory in fantasy land as well. Congrats, Jeff!
Passing Yards
Drake Maye 785
Josh Allen 755
Lamar Jackson 722
Patrick Mahomes 669
Jordan Love 663
Passing TDs
Lamar Jackson 9
Bo Nix 5
Drake Maye 5
Jared Goff 5
Jordan Love 5
Josh Allen 52 Tied with 4
Fantasy Points (All)
Lamar Jackson 82.68
Josh Allen 73.6
Jonathan Taylor 71.1
Jalen Hurts 64.84
James Cook 64
Fantasy Points (Non-QB)
Jonathan Taylor 71.1
James Cook 64
Puka Nacua 59
Amon-Ra St. Brown 58.4
Christian McCaffrey 57.4
Rushing Yards
Jonathan Taylor 338
James Cook 284
Travis Etienne 270
Derrick Henry 242
Bijian Robinson 239
Rushing TDs
James Cook 4
Jalen Hurts 45 Tied with 3
Defense - Fantasy Points
Minnesota 49
Pittsburgh 34
Green Bay 31
Washington 29
Detroit 25
Defense - Sacks
Detroit 11
Green Bay 10
Minnesota 9
Washington 9Pittsburgh 8
Receptions
Puka Nacua 29
Christian McCaffrey 25
Chris Olave 23
Jaxon Smith-Njigba 22
JaMarr Chase 21
Garrett Wilson 21
Receiving Yards
Puka Nacua 333
Jaxon Smith-Njigba 22
Malik Nabers 251
JaMarr Chase 241
Amon-Ra St. Brown
Receiving TDs
Amon-Ra St. Brown 4
Rome Odunze 4Emeka Egbuka 3
11 Tied with 2
FG Made
Brandon Aubrey 8
Cam Little 7
Cameron Dicker 7
Harrison Butker 7Chase McLaughlin 6
Kai Fairbairn 6
I wasn't sure what to do for the Week 3 Comedy Bit...so I tracked down a local co-ed(we're still calling female college students that in 2025, right?) and had her go through SEWIFFL Tinder. Everyone, please welcome Paislee.
"Hi, I'm Paislee...so I literally know nothing about fantasy football. Like, I thought PPR was maybe a skincare routine? But I love making snap judgments about people, and honestly, the team names are kind of hilarious. So yeah… I’ll be swiping left or right on these dudes based on pure vibes and whether their players look like they’d buy me tacos at 2 a.m."
The Salty Spitoon (2–1, 352.6 PF)
“Name sounds kinda tough, like a dive bar with sticky floors. But 352 points feels like… a lot? He’s probably the kind of guy who has like five tabs open in his brain at once. Swipe right, daddy issues are temporary.”
Peeping Thomas (2–1, 315.8 PF)
“Okay, ew, the name? 🚩🚩🚩. Why are you peeping? Why are you Thomas? I don’t care if you have a winning record, this feels like the kind of guy who would DM me unprompted at 2 a.m. Swipe left.”
Trash Pandas (1–2, 358.1 PF)
“Omg raccoons are cute. And he actually scored more points than a lot of these other guys? That’s like… sneaky hot. Feels like he’d steal my fries but also defend my honor. Swipe right.”
Muddy Bananas (1–2, 332.7 PF)
“Uhhh the name makes me uncomfortable? Like weirdly mushy vibes. He’s fine, but like, middle-of-the-pack fine. Swipe left, but respectfully.”
The Bearded Clams (1–2, 332.1 PF)
“Are you kidding me with that name? This is some gross Barstool humor. BUT… he did beat the champs last week so he has a little bad boy energy. Against my better judgment, swipe right.”
Joe Buck Yourself (3–0, 385.4 PF)
“Unbeaten, 385 points scored, the vibes are immaculate. And the name? Kinda iconic. He feels like the guy who would text back AND remember my coffee order. Swipe right so hard my phone screen cracks.”
Pack Attack (2–1, 412.5 PF)
“Woah, 412 points?? That’s like… top of the class hot. But something about the name feels like a weird midwestern dad with too much Packers merch. Swipe right, but I’m side-eyeing the Crocs he probably wears.”
Cotch11 (1–2, 327.8 PF)
“Honestly? This looks like a username from Xbox Live. Like he would still call me ‘bro’ after a date. He tries though, and he’s cute in a ‘mom likes him’ way. Swipe left.”
Big Nix Energy (2–1, 338.8 PF)
“Okayyy, punny. I don’t know who Nix is, but the confidence? Love that. Even though his points allowed are kinda high, I don’t know what that means. Swipe right, purely off vibes.”
Powderhoundmals (1–2, 343.3 PF)
“PF 343 but PA 384? That feels like a lot of red flags. This is giving like… ski bro who talks about powder days while ignoring your texts. Swipe left, go chase your mountain, sir.”
Pinche Bendejo (1–2, 311.3 PF)
“Okay the name made me giggle. It’s giving messy but fun energy. Points are low, but sometimes the toxic ones are the hottest. Swipe right, but only for the chaos.”
BWTB (1–2, 314.5 PF)
“Short name, mysterious. Are you hiding something? Probably. But you’ve got ‘sad boy who strums guitar badly at parties’ energy. Swipe left, I’ve been through enough.”
"Okay, so… that’s my swiping for the week. Honestly, half these team names sound like gas station energy drinks, and the other half feel like rejected Xbox gamertags. If I’m being real, I don’t think any of you are husband material—maybe like, ‘text me when you’re drunk’ material at best. Anyway, good luck with your little league thing… I’ll probably forget all of this by tomorrow."
A couple things I'm working on stat/records wise: I'll slowly be inputting weekly scores/stats from past seasons. I've still got access to the league going back to the beginning of the Fleaflicker era in 2020. It'll be tedious, but I honestly enjoy putting excel to work for me. That'll allow me to pull out all time records/high/low scores, all time standings. etc. That's a long-term pet project for me.
Thank you for reading and putting up with my low brow comedy. Good luck this week!
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